Monday, April 28, 2008

Coming Full-Circle

Rodrigo is back.

I won’t go into a great deal of detail, it is too personal. Suffice to say that I received an email from Rod about a month and a half ago, saying that he’d been doing a lot of personal development work and wanted to meet to discuss reconciliation. After two weeks I conceded, we met and have hardly been apart since.

In many ways, we’ve fallen back into old routines and social circles and it feels as if he never left; a comfortable familiarity. In other ways, there is a new level of maturity in the relationship and improved communication and negotiation. In short, we’re both happy but understand that a relationship is an ongoing process that requires communication and compromise on many different levels.

We are not living together yet (although he spends every night here) and I have some “unraveling” to do. For example, I had rented out the ranchito for five months beginning in November of this year. (I didn’t know where I was going to go but I was going to go somewhere.)

Additionally, since construction has started on the casita, there is no longer a dog house for his dogs. This little detail, however, did not prevent him from seizing an opportunity to acquire a new family member while working at a dog show in neighboring Queretaro.

Enter BG (for Big Girl).



BG is a three month old Newfoundland puppy who promises to weigh close to 130 Lbs. when full grown.

I explained to Rod that bringing BG to the ranchito is kind of like surprising me with a new roommate; a roommate who is not potty trained and likes to tromp through the flower beds.

But she is awfully cute, and I’ve agreed to try. And he’s agreed that no new dogs will magically appear. I guess that counts as compromise.

Valentine’s in San Luis Potosi

Pao and Alex and I were having dinner one night before Valentine ’s Day. “Alex,” I said, “Do you remember several years ago, when you put together that lonely hearts Valentine’s dinner at Market Bistro? What were we, 17 people? If you were to do that for this Valentine’s, how many would we be?”

Alex thought for a moment. “Three,” he said, “And we’re all sitting right here. Everyone else who was there is coupled, married or no longer in San Miguel. And we haven’t met any new single people.”

“That’s depressing,” said Pao. “How pathetic would that look? The three of us out to dinner together on Valentine’s Day.”

“Then let’s get out of town. We don’t want to run into any of our ex’s, potentially out on a date with their new squeezes.” I thought for a moment. “Victor! San Luis Potosi! Victor will be alone on Valentine’s . . . Mark is in the U.S. . . . They have plenty of bedrooms and it’s only two hours away.”

Suddenly Valentine’s Day wasn’t a depressing “thing” looming in our future. We got on the phone, called Vic and a plan was born. Alex and I would drive up on Thursday, Pao would schedule a sales call for Friday in San Luis and meet us there Thursday night. We’d bring our golf clubs and play a round at the country club.

Valentine’s dinner was at an upscale Chinese restaurant, surprisingly named “China Express”. It was a wonderful treat as we lack good Chinese food in San Miguel. (We have it; it just isn’t very good.)

San Miguel has a very nice, and challenging, golf course called Club Malanquin. But it is only nine holes. If we play on a weekday after 2:00 PM, it costs about 500 pesos. So on Friday in San Luis, for about 1,000 pesos, we played our first full 18 holes and finished just as the sun was setting. The course was in a gated community with about every style of architecture imaginable; the common thread being a lot of money. (This is clearly how the “other half” lives in Mexico.) We all had fun and I could tell that Pao and Alex were rapidly becoming addicted to the sport.

The next day we toured centro and stopped in to visit the new Hotel Palacio de San Agustin http://www.palaciodesanagustin.com I have not included any photos because none can compare to those on their website (I highly encourage you to click on the link). While we were sipping sodas in the lobby, waiting for our private tour of the hotel, Alex and Pao began flipping through a large photo book they found on one of the tables. The book contained high quality photographs of the best golf courses in Mexico.

“This is what we should do,” said Alex. “Travel around Mexico playing all these courses.” Pao agreed with him.

“Great,” I said. “I’ve gotten you hooked on the most expensive sport possible.”

The last night Victor and I left Pao and Alex talking in the courtyard while we ventured off to one of the local gay bars called El Greko. It was really my first time out since the break-up and I have to say that I enjoyed myself immensely. Quite apart from San Miguel, Gringos are not common in San Luis. Victor’s friends were educated, well dressed and friendly. Many spoke English and were anxious to practice. I received all kinds of attention, especially from a totally ripped personal trainer named Hugo. He was so cute I almost asked Victor if I could take him home (but I didn’t).

When Alex and I were driving home the next day, he asked me, “What was your favorite part of the trip?”

“Hugo,” I said. “It was just nice to be flirted with. It did wonders for my self esteem. I can’t stop smiling about it even though I’d never take it any further. For one, he’s about five foot nothing and we’d look pretty silly together. And, he doesn’t speak a word of English and lives with his family. I think we’d have a little trouble finding any common ground. What was your favorite part of the trip?”

“The golf,” Alex replied without hesitation. “It was so cool. We have to go back and do it again.”

And so I imagine we will.