A Marriage of Challenge

I’m going to perpetrate a local rumor that has been represented as fact.

Maria de Jesus, Christine’s maid, is a woman in her 60’s. Not a particularly attractive woman, and from a poor family, she married late for a Mexican woman, probably in her 30’s.

Maria de Jesus had heard, from her sisters and friends, about the act of sex and was intrigued. On her wedding night she shivered in anticipation. But nothing happened. Not that night or any of the nights to follow.

Maria de Jesus settled into married life without the carnal benefits. After two years of performing the role of wife and housekeeper, she began to wonder. What was missing? Clearly the role of motherhood. And, as she understood, sex was required before one could become a mother.

She finally rallied her nerve and approached her husband with the subject. He begrudgingly explained to her that sex was not an option because he did not have a penis. When he was a small boy, he was bitten on his penis, by a spider. The site became infected and inflamed and subsequently, his penis had to be removed.

Given that he had not disclosed this prior to marriage, Maria de Jesus approached the Catholic Church and promptly had the marriage annulled.

There was a movie made in the U.S., called “The 40-Year-Old Virgin”. The lead character was male. Rumor has it; Maria de Jesus might be able to top his story. Or at least surpass his timeline.